Ayla's medicine

Today I went and picked up Ayla's medicine that she is supposed to start this weekend. When I got into the car, I pulled out the papers to read about it and I was shocked to see not one, but THREE pages of possible side effects/adverse reactions. The very first line says, "Methotrexate has infrequently caused serious sometimes fatal side effects". Other complications are nausea, bone marrow suppression, liver problems and mouth sores. Monthly lab work is also required while on this medicine to make sure the liver is not affected. Oh, that's just great. I could barely hold back the tears knowing that I had to put this awful drug into my baby's body. I just don't know if I can do this or not. This drug will also lower Ayla's immune system which worries me as well. It warns you to stay away from sick people and wash your hands frequently. This will surely put John into a frenzy, he already sanitizes EVERYTHING. Seriously, he takes Clorox wipes everywhere! I don't know about this now, I am not feeling very comfortable about giving this to her. I will keep everyone updated.